Love Marriage Ke Side Effects
There was a time when love marriages were considered a taboo in Indian society.
Even now it's quite a task to persuade your parents for the love marriage. Incidents of honour killings are still prevalent in rural parts of India.
But the perspective of the educated and the working class has changed with time up to a certain limit. They finally give in to their child's wish.
"Aakhir bachchon ki khushiyon ke aage ghutne tekne hi padte hain."
This is what most of the parents would say after giving their consent for their son or daughter's love marriage.
But this is not what we call a happy ending of a love story.
What happens after the wedding? Does parents' approval mean acceptance of the new member in the family?
Here I am going to mention a few concerns on this issue.
No blame game- if anything goes wrong in a love marriage neither the boy nor girl can blame anyone because they are the only ones who have chosen their life partner.
"to ab bhugto", "hum to pehle hi mana kr rhe the." This is what the parents will say if you have any complaints about your life partner.
You need to prove yourself- since you are not your inlaws choice as the life partner for their son or daughter, you need to constantly struggle to please them and prove your suitability.
You are always under their radar. Though the things are easier for a boy because he doesn't have to move to his wife's home after marriage. A girl has to try really hard to seek her inlaws blessings.
You can choose the man but not the family- marriage is like a package deal. With every life partner comes his or her family.
Even if you don't like your would-be inlaws you can't do anything about it because you are in love with the man. So there is no point in evaluating his family members.
You owe to them-they might have welcomed you but had not accepted you yet. And this mindset is going to cause you a lot of trouble.
They will always keep reminding you that you owe to them for their permission for this alliance. So they are not the ones who are going to make any adjustments with you. You will be the one making all the efforts.
Their prejudices about you- according to them you are a "chalak girl" because you had fallen in love. This is Indian psyche that if a girl is having an affair then she is a clever girl. It directly entitles you for the title of "home breaker" too.
If the relationship between you and your inlaws turn sour and you decide to live separately then you are the only one to be blamed.
Remember you are the "chalak girl" here and now a home breaker too.
In addition to the above points, I would like to mention that it is not necessary that you won't be able to strike a chord between you and your inlaws. There is always a possibility of a pleasant relationship.
And your life partner whom you already know up to a certain extent will definitely help you to mingle with his/ her family members.
So, all the very best!